Small Things That Make a Change

For many living years of my life, I’ve seen many faces of this country called Indonesia. Have been living in one of the most crowded city of the world—Jakarta—gave me perception of what is called to be “Life is Hard “. Since Suharto’s fall on 1998, I’ve seen the country risen up slowly, but I’m becoming unsure whether it rises to perfection or destruction. I’ve seen many state owned enterprises cleaned themselves from their dirty image of corruption and nepotism. BUMN like PLN, PT KAI, and others have been taking pledge to rebuild themselves and trying to make a change. People are working harder in different role, they’re trying to help themselves to build the nation. Many movements take charges and the movement gets more creative each days. They’re not rushing to go down the street and read their demand with loudspeaker anymore, they’re taking different ways to reach the society and the government. To have the chance to speak up, to be heard.

A small movement that have been encourage people to send postcard through air mail named Card to Post, made a program called Postcards to Mr. President (Kartupos untuk Pak Presiden) where they wanted to gather as many postcards as possible that contain everything they want to tell to Mr. Yudhoyono. Other community named Indonesia Berkebun has been activately involved on several green projects to create green area on the heart of the city. The pilot project has been applied on many corners of Jakarta, and now has spread its project to other big city like Bandung, Bogor, and Semarang. Many youth program blooms, Indonesian Youth Conference is one of them. Initiated by Alanda Kariza, the program aims to be a place where young people gather and exchange their concerns and idea. Or even our friend from Good News from Indonesia (GNFI) that intended to spread positiveness and optimism through good news that coming from many corner of Indonesia. It is relieving to see so many people /that/ care. It gives me hope on humanity, hope to awaken the country that for many years has been safely keeping the name “The Sleeping Giant”.

But this morning, some thing strucked me. Reading the essay titled Take a Train in Jakarta gave me meltdown. I don’t know where it comes from, but suddenly I feel so small and powerless. We’re just a particle in this galaxy and why should we live if we’re not changing anything to the world we’re living? There must be a bigger conspiracy that made us still breathing this air, still enjoying the sound of the clock’s ticking. Jakarta is just a small city with it 661 km2, but with its over 9 million population, what can be worsen could happen in the near future?

Ever heard the term Negara Semut? That said you just need to do your role right in order to make everything right. I try to diffuse to that term for some times. The thoughts that I just need to do my role perfectly. Then after that, I just need to wait until every screw is in the exact places. Leave the democracy to those who learn politics. Leave the demand for health insurance to those who study it. Leave the lack of quality of education to those who wanted to become a teacher. Isn’t it selfish? I felt so terrible to ever have those thoughts. Is it just my gateway to close my eyes for any other problems other than mine? Is it just my act to be careless?

To feel powerless over miserable place we’re living is miserably sad. ‘Better Doing Something than Nothing’ is still laying in my head, and I still hoping to make some change. I know it won’t be an instant process. It takes a long time to fix the country because the root of destruction comes from each of us, from the darkest times of our life, from the traumatic accidents happen in the past. Changes are not easy to make, but changes are needed for us to stay alive, in order for us to survive.

I’ve been tired of this country for many times, I have been betrayed for many times. But if I have to say one lesson that Indonesia (or simply Jakarta) has thought me the most, it is the will to never give up the fight. This city has been telling its miserable story that made me believe that I need to hold on to hope, to try even harder, to not give up easily in order to change those miserable stories into glorious ones.

Indonesia, I won’t give up on you, so don’t give up on us too.

Big things always come from small ones. And small things always have impact, no matter how small it is. One hour in your life could mean a day for other people, so start thinking about the bigger part of your day. Try giving a hand to those who needed, it can be anything that you can do. It could be a little trouble for you but it can be a big help for other. Start living!

Titipan

Di atas papan semua orang punya waktu tiga jam untuk mengetahui arti hari itu.
Tapi mungkin tidak cukup waktu seribu tahun untuk mengetahui arti keberadaan.
Bagi kamu tangis itu adalah jawaban untuk segalanya dan alasan untuk melangkahkan kaki.
Bagi kami tangis itu adalah semangat pacu untuk memulai mencari arti.
Dibutuhkan kamu dan kami untuk duduk berhadapan.
Entah untuk menghasilkan sebuah gelombang baru ataukah untuk sekedar bercengkrama.
Sehabis ini izinkanlah kami bertemu lagi.
Dengan mengenakan sepatu di alam mimpi, dititipkan semua yang selama ini dicari.
Terima kasih telah mampir, dan percayalah titipan itu akan kami simpan.
Sampai suatu saat nanti, titipan itu akan kami serahkan lagi.
Kepada semua yang terus lahir, untuk mencari arti keberadaan.
Dan kali ini mungkin tidak perlu waktu seribu tahun.

Selamat hari Sabtu.

The Fall

In the game between feelings and reality, there is one who always wins anyway. Truth.
Do you hear the sound in your head that used to guide you to tears or laugh? Does it matter anymore in the sake of happiness?
Shoot for the moon, they say. But in order to do that, one needs to fly. Whether you landed amongst the stars or landed here on earth, it is the flight that matters. The jump and the fall, the excitement and the pain.
Everyone meant to be brokenhearted, yet everyone deserves happiness. So, take this fall, and after this, let’s hug the galaxy.

There’s plenty of fish in the sea, but there’s always plenty of stars to catch in the sky :)

Naik Kereta Keliling Jawa

 Setelah tahun lalu tanpa sengaja mendapat link tentang perjalanan keliling Jawa dengan kereta, saya cukup terobsesi untuk mengadakan perjalanan yang sama. Sebenarnya niatan untuk melakukan perjalanan ini sudah ada beberapa waktu sebelumnya ketika membaca Traveler Indonesia dengan liputan utama yang sama. Akhirnya dengan sisa field break yang belum diambil dan long weekend pertama di tahun 2012, saya kesampaian juga naik kereta keliling Jawa.

Hal yang pertama direncanakan tentu saja rute perjalanan. Kereta apa yang digunakan dan jadwal yang tepat sehingga waktu 3 hari yang saya punya tidak terbuang percuma. Cara termudah mengefisienkan waktu adalah mencari kereta malam sehingga menghemat uang penginapan dan ‘tau-tau sampai’ :P. Saran saya sih untuk yang berminat lewat Jalur Utara, wajib hukumnya mencari jadwal kereta pagi/siang, too good to be missed. Awalnya saya sudah merencanakan untuk menaiki 6 kereta, dengan rute Jakarta – Bandung – Malang – Surabaya – Banyuwangi – Surabaya – Semarang – Jakarta. Tapi karena waktu yang tidak memungkinkan dan karena kehabisan tiket (padahal saya beli hampir sebulan sebelumnya), akhirnya cuma kesampaian naik 4 kereta saja. Sempat ganti rencana mendadak di loket karena kehabisan tiket Argo Sindoro (Semarang Tawang – Gambir) untuk pulang, untungnya teringat Fajar Utama yang berhenti di Stasiun Pasar Senen. Rute yang dipilih akhirnya Bandung – Surabaya – Banyuwangi – Surabaya – Semarang – Jakarta. Dengan kereta yang dipilih Argo Wilis – Mutiara Timur – Mutiara Timur – Gumarang – Fajar Utama.

live another years

And why would you still standing there?
Shiny, plastic, non-degradable.
Is it you, finally, being you?

But you will live hundreds years.
And we’re the ones who’ll wither and die.
So, be it.
Be you.

Ambil Segalanya

Sekarang hujan lagi.
Apa hari ini kamu akan tersenyum lagi?
Di ketinggian seperti ini, keluhan atau rasa bahagia itu seperti mengabur.
Apa itu tanda kamu akan diam di sana?
Coba rasakan angin ini, dan ambil segalanya.
Ambil segalanya.
Apakah kamu masih merasa tidak cukup?

Envy

Envy is a strong word.

Melihat teman-teman (apalagi teman-teman dekat) meraih sesuatu yang lebih dari kita, kadang bikin minder. Entah mereka dapat pekerjaan bagus, atau dapat beasiswa nun jauh di sana. Padahal seharusnya kita ikut merasa bangga atas apa yang dicapai si teman dan menjadikannya cambuk semangat untuk berusaha lebih lagi.

Sometimes in my bizarre insane times, I got down so much that I blame myself for all those inability. To do great is never going to be my thing. I kept questioning why I couldn’t get the same chances, the same success.

Tapi kemudian saya sadar, teman-teman saya yang punya pekerjaan di perusahaan multinasional mungkin belum pernah membantu orang lain meneruskan sekolah. Teman-teman saya, yang digaji besar atau digaji dollar, bisa membiayai adik-adiknya bayaran SPP, toh saya juga bisa. Jadi apa yang sebenernya saya permasalahkan? Apa ukuran sukses bagi masing-masing orang?

But what’s the point of all the glory, if you’re not doing something for others? If you’re not touching anyone?

Saya menertawakan teman saya yang pindah haluan ke perusahaan Tambang hanya karena ingin bekerja di ‘perusahaan yang punya nama besar’ (di kasus ini walaupun dengan embel-embel terkenal dari segi gaji malah down grade istilahnya, dari segi experience-pun terlihat mundur dan bergaji lebih). Tapi kemudian saya sadar bahwa saya sedang menertawakan diri sendiri. Apa bagusnya kerja di perusahaan besar dan terkenal, disebut hebat oleh orang lain kalau punya waktu untuk membantu orang lain saja tidak ada? Ketika saya mendengar pendapat teman yang bilang kalau dengan mencari uang yang banyak, dia ingin membantu orang lain. Saya malah menertawakannya lebih kencang, membantu itu harusnya ada ketika ada niat. Karena membantu tidak melulu tentang uang (walaupun pada kenyataannya uang akan sangat amat membantu).

In the end, I found relieve.

Tujuan akhir manusia saya bukan untuk dikenal karena titel perusahaan, karena harta melimpah, apa lagi karena gengsi, tapi saya ingin dikenal dengan seberapa banyak saya menyentuh orang lain untuk meraih mimpinya.

Terdengar seperti pembenaran? Tapi saya sangat yakin dengan pilihan ini. Terlalu, sangat, yakin.

Take the Waltz

2012, well yes, a new year.

What come across me actually for this year? Except for the Lego set, nothing (I even sometimes doubt do I really want a Lego set instead of the train set and/or a Buzz Lightyear action figure). There are actually some plans, but it is rather blurred and somewhat surreal. I kept trying to write what achievement I would make for this year, but I ended up writing stuff I want to buy instead. Somewhat, pathetic.

What changes a year can make, well, I found myself rather more pessimistic than last year. A lot of failure really gives you scar, you know. But yeah, I really want to make that change once more. There, I found one. Be more optimistic about life.

The rest follows, write more in a proper manner and grammar including movie review or transportation system issue. Giving more in my league, in my way. Take chances of all possibilities, without feeling envy about other people’s life.

Just carry on.

On Zombie Apocalypse

Sometimes, I want to shout it out.

Zombie apocalypse is not going to happen!

Please. Don’t make it sound terribly cool. It just looks good on PopCaps games and one of that British movie. Period.

and yeah, I’m just kidding.

2011

To be honest, 2011 is like a blink of an eye—flashing but somehow calming. It is a year of denial for me, there are a lot of things I have to fake just to look normal. To follow the stream is never be my safest belt. To calm myself and finally found peace is an okay phase for me, because I know there will be another that would come and messed up things up. Jamie is right, Twenty Something would never be easy on you.

But my wish for 2011 did come true, I am happy.

At January I got myself busy, in my own way, trying to get a job. Lots of failure.

At February to April I earned my first of coins, tried to find a way to save the world, and I went on a short trip to Solo and Jogja.

At May, I got my first real job, too bad it is related to engineering :)) Got new friends, new people to make joke with, to laugh together at funny words with, to play Yugi-oh card game online together with, to take picture at helipad with, etc. Having friends are always wonderful ♥. The rest of the months are flowing pretty much the same. Paperworks and deadlines. A cup of tea in the morning. A fingerprint scan in the afternoon. Zombie life, perhaps? Unfortunately, I refuse to that, I still wanted to take the best of life. I learned about a lot things. It’s like taking Semester Pendek of my whole college academic life, sometimes got me headache but yeah I need to continue to live :P And I started a scholarship program with friends from my college major, it pretty much keep my spirit up. Wish us luck on our first selection process.

At November and December, I got my first site visit to Tiaka at Sulawesi. The first artificial island at Indonesia made above coral (fun facts! Try to Google ‘Tiaka’ and you will find lots of frightening news related about the riot happened back there, still surreal I just happened to step there). And finally at December I went to Ujung Pangkah at East Java. Saw ‘tanks as big as Gelora Bung Karno’ and a pantry with limitless supply of hot Milo :))

I’m still fighting myself about these growing-old-things. A vacancy with bigger salary and benefit, a scholarship abroad, high heels, make-up, an invitation wedding, screw it! Why rushing?

But I’m still having fun and I guess that’s the key

I’m a twenty something and I’ll keep being me

Twenty Something – Jamie Cullum

To finally found a slight of light, and happiness, it feels comforting. Yes, I still refuse growing old. I freeze my sanity here, I will keep those bubble of dreams (and lots of surreal movies). Like as I always said, keep the children inside of you. And then let them fly, like a boss :)

Happy (short) holiday.

—

And for 2012, I propose for a year full of decorating future world. And I promise you, it will be full of (the obvious) rainbow glimpse and a splash of gold. One of the targets? Maybe buying my first Lego set and make a fortress out of it :D